Page 1
Panel 1. Lieutenant's door.
Panel 2. Lieutenant seated at his desk, looking stern.
LT.
Detective Tracy, you're making this whole precinct look bad!
Panel 3. Repeated shot, zoomed out. Tracy from behind. Classic yellow trench coat.
LT.
You're a damn good cop, but you're reckless.
Panel 4. Close-up on Lieutenant.
TRACY (O.P.)
I get the job done, Lieu.
Panel 5.
LT.
Shuttup and listen, Tracy.
Panel 6.
LT.
We have procedures around here...
Panel 7.
LT.
And you need to learn how to work within them.
Panel 8.
LT.
You represent this precinct. You represent all of us.
Panel 9.
LT.
We need to set an example for the community.
Panel 10.
LT.
Why can't you be more like Detective Samantha?
Panel 11. Behind Tracy.
TRACY
Oh, right, "The Happy Detective."
Panel 12. Reveal of Det. Tracy's face, looking insulted.
TRACY
The Happy Detective can kiss my ass.
Page 2
Panel 1. Three armed men establish control over a bank lobby.
CAPTION
Across town...
ROBBER #1
Nobody move!
Panel 2. A big white van waits across the street.
CAPTION
Outside...
Panel 3. Interior of van. Jimmy at the wheel, looking panicked.
JIMMY
C'mon, c'mon. What's taking so long?
Panel 4. The robbers burst out of the bank.
Panel 5. The crooks pile in. Jimmy is hesitant.
JIMMY
Sooo... how did it go?
ROBBER #1
Drive, moron!
Panel 6. The getaway car rushes down the street.
Panel 7. A boxy brown sedan trails the crooks.
ROBBER #1
Hey, guys, we're being followed.
Panel 8. A hand props a portable police siren atop the trailing sedan.
ROBBER (O.P.)
It's the cops!
Panel 9.
ROBBER
Step on it, kid.
JIMMY
I think it's 35 here.
Panel 10. A bullet erupts through the main robber's face, coating the windshield from inside.
Panel 11. Reveal: Det. Samantha beaming behind the wheel, holding a gun through the shattered windshield.
SAMANTHA
This is the part of the job I love.
Panel 12. Samantha jerks the wheel hard, still grinning ear to ear.
SAMANTHA
Well, heck, I love the whole thing!
Page 3
Panel 1. Samantha drives with one hand, holding a bullhorn in the other.
SAMANTHA
Alright, boys, you've had your fun. Time to face the music.
Panel 2.
ROBBER #2
C'mon, kid, lose this creep.
Panel 3. Robber #2, shot through the body, grimaces in pain.
JIMMY
I'm gonna pull over.
Panel 4. Detective Samantha pulls the uninjured assailant through the door frame of the van. The others seemingly subdued inside.
CAPTION
Soon...
Panel 5.
SAMANTHA
One dead, one injured, but two good collars.
Panel 6.
SAMANTHA
All thanks to you, partner.
JIMMY
Yeah, we did OK.
Panel 7. The getaway van peels off down the street.
SFX
Screech!
ROBBER #2
So long, suckers!
Panel 8. A smiling Det. Samantha takes one shot down the long road.
SAMANTHA
Oh, no you don't.
Panel 9. The car flips forward in a fiery explosion.
JIMMY (O.P.)
Oh no, Sam. There goes the evidence.
Panel 10.
SAMANTHA
Not to worry, Jimbo. This crook will just have to plead guilty.
Panel 11. The remaining robber responds nervously, fearing for his continued safety.
ROBBER #3
Sure, man. You got it.
Panel 12.
SAMANTHA
See there? All's well that ends well.
Page 4
Panel 1. Samantha and Jimmy enter the station with their one remaining perp.
SAMANTHA
We got a live one here, Loot.
Panel 2.
TRACY
One?
Panel 3.
JIMMY
Plus two dead on the scene.
Panel 4. Samantha absent-mindedly tosses his prisoner into a cell with too much force.
TRACY (O.P.)
One perp? I thought this was supposed to be a big bust?
ROBBER
Ow!
Panel 5. Sam greets Tracy with genuine enthusiasm.
SAMANTHA
Black Tracy! Good to see you.
Panel 6. Resentful, Tracy grumbles a response.
TRACY
C'mon, Sam. I just saw you this morning.
Panel 7. Lieutenant's door.
CAPTION
Soon...
TRACY (O.P.)
This is BS, Lieu.
Panel 8. Inside the Lieutenant's office.
TRACY
Happy Sam kills two perps and I'm the one getting chewed out?
Panel 9. The lieutenant beams with fatherly pride over Samantha.
LT.
A positive attitude goes a long way, Tracy.
Panel 10.
SAMANTHA
You're hair looks great, Tracy. Did you get it cut?
Panel 11. Tracy storms out.
Panel 12.
LT.
Forget him, Sam. I've got another case for you...
Page 5
Panel 1.
BACON
Another big day of riding Sam's coattails, eh rookie?
Panel 2.
JIMMY
Leave me alone, Porkins.
TRACY
Why does the new guy get all the best assignments?
Panel 3.
JIMMY
I just wanna do my job.
Panel 4.
SAMANTHA
And a darn fine job it was, Jim.
Panel 5.
JIMMY
Got you some coffee, Sam.
SAMANTHA
Thanks, Champ.
Panel 6.
BACON
"Got ya some coffee, Saaaam."
TRACY
Did you get me any coffee, Jimmy?
Panel 7.
JIMMY
Leave me alone, guys.
Panel 8.
SAMANTHA
A good laugh keeps station morale up.
TRACY
See, Jimmy? Happy Sam gets it.
Panel 9.
JIMMY
Little do they know...
Panel 10.
SAMANTHA
C'mon, Jimmy. We caught another case.
Panel 11.
BACON
What? You two had the last one!
Panel 12.
SAMANTHA
Sour grapes!
Page 6
Panel 1.
SAMANTHA
Ah, my beautiful Jessica. How are you, Detective Monroe?
Panel 2. Reveal: Det. Monroe is gorgeous, the classic blonde bombshell.
MONROE
Headed out?
Panel 3.
SAMANTHA
Big case. Very Dangerous.
MONROE
But so are you.
SAMANTHA
Nothing I can't handle.
Panel 4.
MONROE
So, will I... see you tonight?
Panel 5. Close-up. Bedroom eyes.
SAMANTHA
...
Panel 6. Close-up. Monroe bites her bottom lip.
MONROE
...
Panel 7. The atmosphere changes dramatically.
SAMANTHA
You bet! Shelly and I will be over at eight, sharp.
Panel 8.
MONROE
Great. My wife is looking forward to seeing you both again.
Panel 9.
SAMANTHA
Have you seen Shelly around, by the way?
Panel 10. Det. Samantha enters the break room.
CAPTION
Then...
SAMANTHA
We're heading out.
Panel 11. Reveal: Shelly is unattractive.
SHELLY
OK, honey.
Panel 12. Samantha gives Shelly a peck on the cheek.
SAMANTHA
Just wanted to say goodbye.
SHELLY
Try not to get any bad guy blood on your detective uniform.
Page 7
Panel 1. Establishing shot. Interior of high-rise office. An Al Capone-style mafia boss sits behind a stately desk.
CAPTION
Masso Family HQ
SFX
Knock, knock.
HENCHMAN
Hey boss, the new guy's here.
Panel 2. A bearded young man with glasses, tattoos, and short shorts enters.
MORRIS
Hey, guy. How's it going? Name's Wolf Morris.
Panel 3. The crime boss looks puzzled, off-put.
MASSO
Wolf? What kinda name is that? Italian?
MORRIS
Pfff.
Panel 4.
MASSO
I've got a shipment of illegal booze coming in tonight. I need you to take care of anybody who interferes.
Panel 5.
MORRIS
Cool. Look, there's this band playing tonight, so I'm gonna go ahead and get outta here. But I'll be around later. Just text me the details or whatever.
Panel 6.
MASSO
This is serious business, kid.
Panel 7.
MORRIS
Yeah, man, kill some cops. No problem. I'll be on it. Later, gator.
Panel 8.
MASSO
Gator? Carta, get in here. Is saying "Later, gator" cool again?
Panel 9.
CARTA
Not that I know of, sir.
Panel 10.
MASSO
What's with that kid?
Panel 11.
CARTA
I dunno, boss, but he came highly recommended.
Panel 12.
MASSO
I don't get it.
Page 8
Panel 1. Samantha and Jimmy hide behind some crates on a loading dock.
SAMANTHA
Jackpot. Here comes the booze.
Panel 2.
JIMMY
These guys all look like workers. Where's all the security?
Panel 3.
SAMANTHA
Beats me. Criminals are pretty dim. Maybe we got lucky.
Panel 4.
JIMMY
Wait a minute. This is 2012. Alcohol is legal. What are we even doing here?
Panel 5.
SAMANTHA
They're prohibition-era barrels. Confiscated in the 20s, stolen back by the mafia. Huge on the black market. Crooks have a thing for vintage.
Panel 6.
MORRIS
Did somebody say vintage?
Panel 7. Morris shoots Samantha in the right shoulder at close range.
JIMMY
Sam!
Panel 8. Despite his injury, Samantha lugs his pistol in his right hand.
SAMANTHA
No sweat, Jimmy. I've got this guy.
Panel 9. Morris shoots Samantha in the right hand.
JIMMY
Sam, no!
Panel 10.
SAMANTHA
Don't worry, Jim. It'll take a lot more than that to take The Happy Detective out of commission!
Panel 11. Morris snaps his fingers and several henchmen pull automatic weapons on Samantha.
Panel 12. Lying prone on the concrete, Samantha's right arm and side are riddled with bullets.
SFX
Budda budda budda
Page 9
Panel 1. Ambulance rushes to the hospital.
SFX
Bwee ooo bwee ooo
Panel 2. Samantha on the gurney.
DOCTOR
Get me 50 CCs of hospital jargon!
Panel 3. Samantha's left hand goes limp.
DOCTOR
We're losing him!
Panel 4. POV shot from hospital bed.
DOCTOR
He's been shot fifty times. He'll never move his right arm again.
BUSINESSMAN
We can rebuild him.
Panel 5. Doctors prepare for dramatic surgery, prosthetics visible in frame.
Panel 7. Samantha looks like Robocop, but can still be identified by his trademark yellow coat.
CAPTION
Then...
ROBO-SAM
You are under arrest. Do not resist.
Panel 8. Repeated shot of thugs with automatic weapons.
Panel 9. Repeated shot of prone Samantha, now as Robocop, being riddled with bullets.
Panel 10. Repeated shot of POV with doctors. Businessman shrugs.
DOCTOR
Well, that didn't work.
Panel 11.
DOCTOR #1
Put him back?
DOCTOR #2
Put him back.
Panel 12. Repeated shot of doctors preparing for surgery.
Page 10
Panel 1. Interior of police station. The detectives are gathered. A "Welcome Back, Sam" banner hangs over the entrance.
CAPTION
Weeks later...
Panel 2.
LT.
All right, people. Happy Sam will be here any minute.
Panel 3.
LT.
I want everybody to stay positive.
Panel 4.
TRACY
But what about, you know, his injuries?
BACON
Yeah, pretty gruesome, right?
Panel 5.
MONROE
Let's just try to follow his example.
Panel 6.
LT.
That's right. If Sam can keep a smile after all this, we owe him the same.
Panel 7. Shelly helps Sam through the door.
Panel 8.
LT.
Sam, you look...
Panel 9. Close-up on Sam's withered, shaking hand.
LT.
...
Panel 10.
MONROE
How do you feel, Sammy?
TRACY
Yeah, Sam, you OK?
Panel 11. A pregnant pause, his face ambiguous.
SAMANTHA
...
Panel 12. His face turns stern forever.
SAMANTHA
I feel like shit.
